A "traditional” funeral involves the laying out of a casketed body for friends and family to pay respects.  The casket itself may be either “open” or “closed”.  An open casket is one in which the casket lid is left open so that the deceased is visible throughout the ceremony.  A closed casket ceremony means the ceremony is held in the presence of the casket, but the casket lid is closed.  The decedent’s family decides which option they prefer after considering the manner of death and condition of the body.

Eulogy is pronounced like this:  /Yule-ah-gee/

A eulogy is simply a speech about a loved one who has died.

This speech is usually given during a memorial or funeral ceremony.  While it is often given by a close friend or relative of the deceased, it can also be given by a religious leader.

Don’t stress out over giving a eulogy.

Think of it as a simple conversation with the family and friends about the life of the person who has died.  Remember, the funeral or memorial ceremony is usually only attended by people that somehow mattered to the deceased.  They are eager to hear about the deceased and will appreciate anything you say.

Almost EVERYONE is afraid of speaking in public

The “audience” is NOT expecting you to give a flawless speech.  If fact, if you “mess up” a little (or a lot), the audience tends to rally around you even more.  They really do!

There is no “right way” to compose a eulogy.

Since most people have no idea what a eulogy is supposed to sound like, you can pretty much create it any way you want.  Here are some things you may want to talk about:

• a brief “life history” of the person who has died

• important achievements and events in the deceased’s life

• details about family, friends, work, and hobbies

• favorite memories of the deceased

Most eulogies last between 5 and 15 minutes but there are no hard and fast rules here.  You can also deliver “vignette” eulogies.  This is where several different people take turns speaking about the deceased.  For example, each of the children of a deceased parent could give a small speech about their favorite respective memory with the deceased.

Breaking a single eulogy into separate vignettes gives others a chance to participate in the services and takes the pressure off of just one speaker.  Even if each person speaks for just a little while, it will seem like a longer, more robust speech because it takes time for each person to walk up to the podium and then return to their seat.